Two conversations about design
There are two conversations about design. The first is technical: deadlines, brief, edits. The second is what we sit down at the table for: meaning, context, idea. Over the years of work, I became accustomed to the first almost thoroughly. I learned to keep the pace, cut off the unnecessary, and translate the client’s chaos into material. But at the end of each project there was often an empty space - the feeling that it was done beautifully, but was done for the sake of something unclear.
Money? There are clearly more of them in other professions. Realization of creative potential? He is strangled by managers and “designer-directors” with with their awesome view of the problem.
The market and its cruel lessons
The market taught me one cruel thing: wanting “like tech” is cheaper than wanting results. The startup wants an identity for case, a corporation wants an in-house world-class specialist for 7/0, other clients want to be designers through someone else’s hands. In such projects you cease to be a partner - you become an instrument. And the tool does not doubt and does not take risks. This is not creativity is the exploitation of a skill that becomes cheaper every day on the background of neural networks.
Maybe I'm idealizing. Maybe in a normal economy such a compromise is a profession. But I was left with bitterness from that the word “creativity” often hides “savings on aspiration.” I made logos, websites, AR filters, illustrations - and felt like either a master or a waiter. On the one hand, pride in what has done. With another is emptiness when you ask yourself the question: “What have you achieved and how have you influenced the world?”.
Two directions of work
Today the studio works on two parallel directions, each of which is important in its own way and fully involves the team.
The first thing is our own projects. Fonts, fan works, posters, merch, web jokes, experiments - everything that is born without a brief and KPI. These projects are not for the portfolio for the sake of likes. This is a game and research, a way to reclaim creativity and to build an independent system where ideas themselves bring value. Working on them allows the studio to develop its processes, become stronger and more visible when the market does not provide the required level of freedom and opportunities.
The second is client projects. We removed express logos, turnkey websites and any ready-made solutions. Now work is possible only through personal discussion and close joint immersion, with a completely individual approach. Refusal has become a tool that clears the resource: for example, when destructive requests come in - from bookmakers to companies, where they offer me to replace the entire design department for salesperson salary in five - we learn to say “no”. Fewer projects, but more involvement and responsibility, more risk - but and more value.
Be part of the team
Being part of a team, and not a service provider, means going deeper into processes, making decisions and bearing the consequences. This is scary: before you could say “I drew it,” but now you have to be responsible for the result. But is exactly this and there is freedom - to choose, for that you are ready to answer.
I am not going to give lectures about “proper freelancing” and write manifestos for others. This is my personal view of the profession in the specific moment. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe in a year everything will change. But now I need honesty - before clients, before the project and with myself.
Catharsis
This and is catharsis: remove the unnecessary, leave only what moves. I am not removing skills, I am changing the meaning of their application. Stronger filter, more engagement, fewer pointless edits. Less game for the sake of game.
Honestly? The future scares me. But I’d rather be afraid than continue to pretend to be useful where is not needed. I don't give a fuck about market guesses; It’s important for me to be honest with what I do. If this is a dead end, then I passed it. If this is a road, then I’m going .

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